The gist- dating while identifying as a feminist is hard. Heck, even having and keeping friends is hard. The problem is that there is always a need to compromise. A lot of comments from friends and significant others need to be taken with a grain of salt, a "sense of humor" is necessary for things that others find funny but you just find offensive, and sometimes the feminist perspective just needs to be put on the back burner because people get tired of hearing it.
I think what is important is to surround yourself with enough people that can rage or geek out with you on feminism, and then even more people that are open to learning new perspectives once in a while. But overall, it is important that all the people around me are generally good people. I give them the benefit of the doubt when they say something I think is iffy because I know that they are honest, caring people who believe in equality and justice. They just aren't quite sure (yet?) what all that means. And frankly, who is? We all have something to learn from each other. But also, sometimes you just need to have fun and live in the moment without analyzing.
I love my friends, my family, and my boy. But I will continue to try and educate them as much as they can stomach it.
Comment on my own post:
Maybe I find a bit less actual problem with this because I don't only (or even mostly) identify as a feminist, but an activist in general, a volunteer, a punk rocker, an athlete, a tomboy, a woman, a partier, a sister, a daughter, a baker, a nurturer, a crafty mofo, an organizer, a cat-lover, a Baltimoron... and maybe soon a rollergirl?
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